


A Ridiculous Plan

by sarcasticchick



Category: Merlin (TV) RPF
Genre: First Kiss, Humor, M/M, Pranks and Practical Jokes, RPF
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-01-01
Updated: 2012-01-01
Packaged: 2017-10-28 15:26:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,394
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/309313
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sarcasticchick/pseuds/sarcasticchick
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He was Bradley-fucking-James; he didn't understand the meaning of the word coward.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Ridiculous Plan

**Author's Note:**

  * For [lilithilien](https://archiveofourown.org/users/lilithilien/gifts).



> Written for my fabulous beta Lilithilien who needed a little (lot of) cheering up. I am her bitch, apparently, because I just wrote Bradley/Colin RPS for her.
> 
> ***Moving things over from LJ as there are better reading/formatting options - not a new fic, but feel free to reread if you'd like!***
> 
> *******

Bradley eyed Colin with complete and utter doubt etched plainly in his eyebrows, lips, hell, he was pretty sure even his nose hairs were wary of Colin's plan.  They _felt_ like they doubted, if nose hairs could doubt.  Which was ridiculous anyway but damn Colin for making him consider his nose hair's propensity for doubt. 

"Didn't take you for a coward, James."

That did it.  That and the shot of tequila, but Bradley wasn't saying anything beyond the lemon wedged in his mouth.  He let his eyes do all the glaring, spearing his insufferable wretch of a castmate with daggers Colin ought to know meant 'I am no bloody coward.' 

From Colin's smirk that belonged more on Arthur's face than Colin's, Bradley rather thought his point was made.  Or failed entirely.  He never was quite sure with Colin. 

He emptied his glass of water on Colin's shirt just to make sure the point was emphatically clear.

***

The plan was simple.  Or at least it was supposed to be simple.  Colin had promised it'd be simple.  But days stretched out into a week and then two, and by that point Bradley's nerves were so stretched that he may have fumbled a line.  Multiple times.  In a row.  In fact, that whole bloody reel was no good and Bradley knew he was to blame, which just made him more frustrated and wound up. 

It was simple.  Right.

So when the day was called early and Katie demanded a pub night, Bradley agreed before anyone else had a chance to respond, then stormed off towards wardrobe as the nerves that were stretched suddenly snapped and left him weak-kneed in relief.

Fucking Colin and his plans.  But the pub night was perfect and the first chance they all had to get together in weeks which meant they could finally pull off this prank of Colin's that Bradley had only agreed to because Colin played dirty.  Called him a coward.  He was Bradley-fucking-James; he didn't understand the meaning of the word coward.

***

So maybe he was a little bit of a coward.

Not that he'd ever tell that to Colin, who was staring at him with the widest canary-eating grin that dripped of the same earnest glee Colin'd had when changing Angel's 'Do Not Disturb' sign.  And when Bradley approached the bar for another round, Colin followed, just as they'd planned.

As _Colin_ had planned.  The tequila in him had merely agreed.

Bradley ordered the next round, orders rolling off his tongue as easily as tomorrow's lines - which he was _not_ going to flub.  A hand touched his back and he knew without looking it was Colin; no one else would have the audacity.  Actually, many did have the audacity, but most times he managed to duck away. 

But this was part of the plan.  Colin's ridiculous plan, which grew more idiotic as the heat of five fingertips and a palm pressed into his skin like Bradley wore nothing more than a threadbare tunic from set.

It was just a kiss.  They'd both done staged kisses before; this was nothing more than that, with no other purpose than to get Katie and Angel (and Tony, but Bradley had selective memory when it came to that participation in the needling) off their backs.  Katie thought it'd be hot, Angel thought they were already shagging and wanted pictures, and Tony ... Tony played his _dad_ for god's sake.  That smirk did not belong on anyone remotely familial, even if it was pretend-family.

That was the plan.  A simple plan.  Stage a kiss while they're watching, end the attempts at bribery and threats of hidden cameras in their rooms because it certainly wouldn't be hot, he and Colin definitely weren't shagging, and ... well, end whatever it was that Tony was thinking.  Simple. 

"They're watching," Colin whispered, and Bradley once again cursed tequila and Colin for his involvement in the plan. 

But Colin had called him a coward.  And that was _so_ not on. 

Bradley didn't waste any time or thoughts about public places and went full-broke on the movie kiss to end all movie kisses.  Face grab, check.  Complete with fingers curled up around those ears that Bradley might call endearing if asked by anyone other than Colin and one lingering over those ridiculously sharp cheekbones.  Lips locked, check.  Only it wasn't a lock, it was more of a mash as Bradley realized a bit late he wasn't kissing a girl far shorter than him but someone of equal height and wasn't that a bit of a shock.  And that shock was the only reason he gasped into the kiss before he could stop himself; it had nothing to do with the lager painting Colin's lips or the way they moved beneath his, twisting and sliding and warm and surprisingly soft without the cake of lipstick or the stickiness of gloss. 

And that gasp was the only reason his lips parted enough for Colin's tongue to sweep in, licking the ale straight off Bradley's teeth and sucking the breath right from his lungs.  At least that's what he blamed for the sudden flash of light-headedness like he hadn't felt since his first blow job, when Samantha Myers had sucked his brains out right through his cock and it was the only explanation for his own retaliation because Colin was not going to get away with thinking he was the superior kisser or whatever it was making him smirk beneath the kiss.

Bradley was the aggressor in this staged kiss. He'd grabbed Colin's face; that _made_ him the aggressor. 

He sucked hard on Colin's tongue, breathing the same air that had probably passed through both their lungs a couple times but Bradley didn't _care_ as he shifted his hips and knotted his fingers in Colin's hair, giving those Merlin-locks a hard tug before he turned the tables.  Colin's mouth tasted of lager and the salty snack things that were addictive like nicotine.  Addictive like _Colin_ , he was discovering, reveling in the twisted fists he could feel clinging to his back and waist and if Bradley moved his thigh just a little so that it pressed firmly between Colin's legs that was just another step ... okay, he wasn't sure what part of the stage kiss that move was, but he was fairly certain that step was in there.  And it was a definite tick 'yes' in the box.

The responding groan from Colin was another check box in the list of steps for a movie kiss, it had to be, Bradley had heard it a lot following that action.

Of course, he could be getting himself confused with porn as far as movie-kiss etiquette went.  He'd seen the steps in porn too; they were just a lot more detailed and usually involved fewer clothes and more fucking.

And if the thought of fucking Colin didn't shoot all the blood to his cock, the hard line Bradley felt pressed against his thigh certainly did. 

Bradley broke the kiss first, huffing like he'd run a marathon and definitely not staring at Colin's red lips all swollen and puffed plump and inviting Bradley to nip and bite and suck until Colin squirmed beneath him.  "Huh," was all he could think to say; his heart was thundering too loudly in his ears for there to be any rational thought outside of the desperate urge to do all that again.  And more.  With less clothes.  And maybe those swollen lips wrapped tight around his-

He was throwing money down on the counter before he could question his thoughts, probably more than the worth of all the alcohol in the pub itself, but Bradley didn't care.  Colin was still staring at him with impossibly blue eyes that weren't actually so much blue as _black_ and it was all Bradley could do not to come in his trousers right there. 

"We need to rethink your plan," Bradley said, dragging Colin by the collar out the pub doors, "in private."

Colin's agreement was music to Bradley's ears and almost drowned out the sounds of the pub as they left, and for the rest of the shoot, he would just pretend he hadn't heard Angel's squeaked 'holy shit' or Katie's 'pay up' or Tony's 'finally' because that was just wrong on so many levels. 

The plan, however, may have been a little bit right.


End file.
